went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
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