Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
