Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
