Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
