Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Randomize
