Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
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