he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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