So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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