I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
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