Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
