would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Randomize
