We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
