i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
