Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
