On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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