So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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