I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
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