Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
