we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
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