Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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