love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
