I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Your penis caused this!
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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