am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Randomize
