Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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