Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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