I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
