So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize