dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
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