Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
