We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Randomize