Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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