if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
