yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Randomize
