Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
