i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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