in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
