I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Randomize
