Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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