Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
it was like eating out sand paper
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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