dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize