It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
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