my room smells like sperm. sweet.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Randomize
