So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
i out mim tonsoeep
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