is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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