Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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