fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
When did we convert life to cartoon?
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Randomize
