Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
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