if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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