she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
