Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
