HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Randomize
